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@ Sheringham Community Paper Issue No 14 - Friday 16th May 2003 - Choose another issue
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Sheringham Community Paper Hello and welcome to hearsay number 14. And yes, look at this, six months have gone already since I penned the first hearsay. What's that? Too long if you ask me I hear some of you groan. "All Vic does is complain and grump about things" Well I, in all honesty have only one thing to say about that. Too right!
And what is more whilst some folk continue to warrant comments about their actions I have to continue to comment as I see fit. It seems that in this town for the time being, I'll never be short of material to scribe about. Grumpily or other wise. Generally mind you, most things that come to ingratiate mine ears tickle my sense of humour. Yes I do have one. All be it, buried deep far beneath that hard, bitter exterior. Actually someone told me once, long ago, that actually I was a very cheerful person. Mostly at any rate!

However to column reading fans. And I'm told on good authority, I do actually have one. I do apologise if the last one or two editions of Hearsay have suggested that I may have joined "The old grump of the year society". Along with, may I say, the rest of those members of our community that are wholly and categorically against our ideologist council's ideas for us having wheelie bins. Yes those delightful waste consultants, who suggest we dispose of our over-packaged household waste in lovely green square bins twice a month might have at last thought of something useful. But one does have to have the space to store them. It would of course stop the marauding tide of cats, squirrels and foxes that rip the liners open and feast on its contents over-night when we leave them out for the collection cart. Personally I'm in favour. At last someone's put some thought finally into designing a waste receptacle big enough to dispose of the Mother-in-law in one go. And judging by the copious amounts of rubbish that was left behind on our streets from our lovely Easter visitors, it looks as if we're all going to need the extra space these bigger bins have to offer. Isn't it a shame that there weren't three varieties really? One for recycled items, one for general waste, and one for all those naughty little vandal imps caught in the act of practising their penalty swing kicks on our street traffic bollards!

Only the other day I was thinking to myself (no friends you see to speak of) Isn't it wonderful how the tourist information board, the N.N.D.C. And the other countless hundreds of holiday home letting agents advertise, or indeed sell our sleepy little town to the masses. Generally by way of profound statements and facts proclaiming Sheringham's assets to the wider populous. It always fills me with awe and wonderment at how fine these holiday brochures make us all out to be to the unsuspecting holidaying family. So much so that they do in fact end up being lured by overwhelming temptation to fork out up to 600 smackeroonies a week! For a small one/two bedroomed cottage sleeping SIX with added bed shelf!? During the height of the season. Check it out for yourselves. Any brochure from any travel agents will confirm all you need to know. It amazes me that folk adorn in their minds eye, this idyllic backdrop image of sea and fauna in a rolling rural landscape, unspoilt and unchanged since Nelly the mammoth came to an icy demise at the end of the last ice-age. And so with this nostalgic perception, these visitors, quite understandably, are drawn to our well "sold", " under funded from Europe", "Large food outlet-less", tea and sandwiched den of gluttony, we love as Sheringham, like the vandals are drawn to working lit traffic bollards.

It seems that a working one if you can find one, acts as a lure like a light bulb attracts summer moths after dark. These creatures (not the moths) must queue in turn for hours, just to have a go at defiling and raising to the ground these structures in their thousands. Wherever you go, and our town is no exception, one can see up-turned "arrowed" bollard tops lying across the road.
I have come to the conclusion that this reputed pastime has grown to be somewhat of an occupation for some. So much so, to see one lit in perfect working order is about as surprising as finding a bunny from Amsterdam in your Easter bouquet. Or indeed a queueless post office at first light opening on pension day!

Someone's getting (quite literally) a big kick out of this ruse. Unless of course I've gone and misread the whole thing. Perhaps instead they're being knocked over by all those little old ladies who can't quite see through the steering wheel, who mistakenly believe the bollards to be the entrance to a drive- thro MacDonald's. Or indeed any private or municipal car park as the slight scraping sound and the gentle bump of the bumper would have little or no effective reaction to these dear old sweethearts. The other alternative reason for the bollard damage could be due to the nocturnal habits of the giant Easter bunny playing ten pin bowling with the tooth fairy. At least the tooth fairy might be able to raise the 750 quid cash that bunny needs for a stay of execution! Maybe the bunny club could come to the rescue? On the other hand perhaps not in Sheringham. But at least it would have plenty of friends.

Which is precisely what our prospective carnival queens need if they are to secure their place in the final selection process. Yep it seems to me that it all depends on how well liked you are, and how many friends you can persuade to vote for you that counts. There you are, and I thought you had to be pretty for that job. Silly me. Still scope for me yet then. I just wonder then, that if the same principals and same selection democratic process were afforded to our current monarky whether her majesty would approve?

Oh well I say good luck to them all. Just a little thought though I am open to bribery and corruption. And my vote will cost a fiver, just drop it in at the office. ONLY KIDDING! Well better nip off now to wax my kneecaps, might even enter myself who knows. Toodle loo Vic.
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In your compilation of negative thoughts under the pseudonym of 'Vic' (I cannot believe that one person has such a negative approach to life in Sheringham) it is suggested that the origin of Daylight Saving is in the second world war. The first Daylight Saving Bill was in 1916. In 1925 there was further legislation which set the dates for the clock changes. The dates have now been rationalised across Europe.
Peter Richardson

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I am trying to trace where a company called Sports Posters has gone. They used to distribute educational posters for use in schools - I have a few and want to expand my collection. They used to be at 9 Holt Road in Sheringham in the 70's, but I don't know what happened to them. The posters were printed at a printers called Tarryton Type Ltd - does anybody know of this company too? Any information would certainly help. Thanks.
Mark Wood.
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