Hello there dear readers. And in the words of our dear friend jimmy Saville.
'Now then, now then, now then, goodness gracious me!" And yes indeed gracious
goodness might have been a quality that was ill afforded to me with the rather venomous,
and somewhat personal written attack on me from a rather less than happy Easter bunny
reader. Well what can I say except I think it's time you took a chill pill.
Not only were they efficiently quick to chide the efforts of many an office worker, of
which I am most definitely not one. They accused me (or rather these office folk) of
slander, but also inadvertently managing to slander me in the process. Two things to
say however immediately spring to mind, and they are "glass houses" and
touché. In fact the anonymous disgusted reader stated that they had never before
been so incensed that they felt the need to personally complain. I can't understand
it. Have they never read the Daily Mail before, or this column come to that! I think
it's clear to see that the aforesaid mentioned was stuck in their office too busy with
urgent matters of state and dealing with all this extra work force they speak of i.e.
personnel, health and safety, public relations and area personnel. Blimey it's no
wonder the county's got little or no cash to go splashing around on fighting the great
Tesco debate! In fact I was sad to read in the same letter that the very lads who
were laying the pavements were also the same ones who were supposed to be clearing our
streets of snow, gritting the roads and making sure we don't endure the wrong sort of
sunshine. Heaven forbid we're allowed a little humour from time to time. One
thought though. If the council can afford umpteen white-collar jobs in health and
safety and personnel etc. etc., how is it they can't find enough cash to fund a few more
road clearing jobs? Instead of these lads having to go gritting the roads at all
hours before they put in a hard day's graft. And don't forget according to our
disgusted reader, all this is taking place whilst everyone else is tucked up in their
beds. A little presumptuous me thinks and rather belittling of the hundreds of hard
working self-employed and other folk out there who have to make an early start if only to
avoid the chaos of the road works! And lets not forget all those of you who very rarely
sleep in you own beds! Yes you know who you are!
Now to be honest I think there have been one or two events that really do warrant getting
hot under the collar about. I for one wish they'd put "grumpy old men" on
earlier, now I might get a tad sweaty around my neck hole but I don't have a Paddy and go
and throw me telly over the cliff! Unlike the ungracious person and or persons who
decided they would quite literally crucify our very own "Churches together"
crucifixion cross by successfully defiling and lobbing it over the edge of the bump.
They might have know the only things to have nearly come a cropper over that cliff
have been the odd microliting rabbit, small boys with big kites, and an old bulb planter
of the two legged variety. Now I don't want to besmirch the press and inflame any
racial tensions or anything. But imagine the coverage in the National press had the
said same symbol had been a crescent! Sheringham however would be safe though.
As I haven't ever seen a "Sheringham Flag" so the burning of that effigy
would probably be impossible. Now I'm only guessing of course. If there is
such an emblazoned emblem of this quintessential quaint little town, then we should have
it flying on the town hall or at the very least a flagpole on top of the clock tower along
with St. George's! To my mind it should fly until the town falls into the hands of a
woeful enemy or Scamrod. Or even dear old May who has finally decided there is
nothing else she can complain about and has handed in her resignation to the fishing sheds
committee. It could be said she had a word in the shell-likes before she left.
Never mind eh? The actual display in the sheds is well worth a visit.
And for a couple of quid and a couple of minuets you'll be able to stare in awe at Peter
Coke's collection. And good on him. At last the place seems to have a useful
purpose other than an eyesore. Unlike the other one of Sheringham's sights that were
fit for sore eyes, and that was the wordswothy display of blooming yellow Hugh that
greeted the natives and holidaying minions alike as we drive and or walk along the
Weybourne road. This year the carpet of daffs were a tribute to the Sheringham in
bloom campaign. Blooming marvellous! And talking of Bloomers, I see that
Barbara Barney has now called an end to trading. No more wondrous uplifts and
eighteen hours of lift and separation (well not unless one enlists the help of an
enhancement plastic surgeon). Yes this in the sad news that the ladies no longer
have an outlet in the bosom of the town in which to cherish their endowments so to speak.
I'm sure you'll all agree the little shop will be missed. Although as one
shop closes others are soon to follow. I can still remember it at as a bookies next
to a greengrocers. Oh well, perhaps Sheringham plus could expand? Well
that's about it for this time except to say I think Sheringham's answer to Palm beach is
great. It's just the reminder we all need that this year, following one of the
driest winters ever, that we're all in for hose-pipe bans, bath with a friend nights and
no illicit water games in the back yard all summer. Happy day's, role on the time my
garden turns to sand and I can enjoy renting out a deckchair or two to passing sightseers,
offering coconut juice at £4.00 quid a glass on the cacti terrace. Costa Del
Sheringham here we come. Take care now. Vic
RE-CAP OF THE READERS LETTER!
I am writing in response to an article in your Sheringham free paper, in particular
'hearsay'. Never before have I been so incensed that I have felt the need to
personally complain. I refer particularly to the slanderous, ignorant abuse of the
county council workmen who are repairing the pavements in Sheringham High Street.
Should 'Vic' ever get the chance to get off their typewriter from behind their cosy desk,
in their nice warm office, maybe they would like to work alongside these men for the day
and get some real experience of hard work.
At first I actually thought for once, that the public would give some gracious recognition
for the hard work they do, but instead the workmen were totally slandered and most
unfairly in my opinion. The 'fellas' do not just 'clear orf' for a stiff drink, they
were invited into P.H. premise for a cup of tea/coffee as they were working right outside
and freezing cold!!!!. The 'fellas' as you quote have to work in freezing
conditions, have to take breaks in accordance with working time regulations, and have to
follow stringent Health & Safety procedures. I would also like to point out that
while the majority of you are tucked up in bed, these men have also been out gritting and
clearing your roads and then doing a full day's work also. So a few late starts and
early finishes are only taken to acommodate the winter maintenance routines.
The workmen involved have had to put up with a tirade of abuse directed at them, when
actually it is the planners that should have the complaints they are the people
responsible for making the decisions not the workmen. They have had dogs urinating
on their equipment, verbal abuse, and cars/lorries running through them, not a 'cushy' job
as you quoted!
I would like to see your journalist trying to cut a flagstone by hand and make it fit!
There are a number of other council representatives who need to visit the site to
ensure that the job is running to plan, who quite rightly may visit in the morning and
then disappear, including Personnel, Health & Safety, Public relations and area
At the end of the day you should fell totally ashamed of yourselves, finding the time to
ridicule hard working citizens working for the benefit of your town. The town
actually needs to continue to attract the 'third home owning, unappreciative visitors' as
you describe them in order to maintain your local economy.
I hope the shop owners who have been very supportive in providing cups of tea and 'putting
up' with the slight inconvenience also write in to counteract your totally ignorant,
narrow minded views printed only with some hope of getting a 'laugh'.
Maybe 'Vic' would like to comment in person to these guys? If so please contact me
and I will arrange for you to spend some time with them, maybe a cup of tea?
Anonymous disgusted reader
I'm writing in response to the anonymous disgusted reader who felt incensed to complain
about your comments of the workmen in the High Street. Does he/she think it's only county
council workmen who have jobs, which are hard work? And, why are you being blamed for the
public not giving some gracious recognition, a tirade of verbal abuse directed at them,
dogs urinating on their equipment and cars/lorries running through them?
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